So this weekend while hanging out with afrofuturistlibrarian2904 and talking about my thesis, I realized something. I think, either my understanding, or better yet, the actual theory I am using, blames the victim.
So I won’t get into too many details, but so, check this out. One way the feminist movement has tried to go about emancipating women has been by telling them how they are being oppressed by the patriarchy. The hope being that, I guess, women will just be like, “yooooooooooooooo,” and then work to emancipate themselves? At least this is my understanding so far.
Like Butler has this thing where it is better to be accounted for than not being accounted for at all. So those of us that know, and I don’t, it is better to be immediately known as “hey that right there is a (variable)” versus “eeewwww! What is that, a man or a woman?!” We are narcissistic.
So for my thesis I am looking at men that define themselves as healthy. This is because men, in the literature, have been found to not be generally healthy. Now, like I mentioned above, and extending forth, am I just being like, “look unhealthy man, these men over here are healthy, what’s up with you?”
So it sounds like victim blaming to me. Either way, if it is, I win because I get to write about how it is and my findings will be that much cooler.
“Kanye’s not big on putting his Grammys up and stuff like that. They literally were like, in the laundry room just randomly in a sock drawer, all around.”—Kim Kardashian on Kanye’s awards (via ultimatekimkardashian)
These girls aren’t wounded so much as post-wounded, and I see their sisters everywhere. They’re over it. I am not a melodramatic person. God help the woman who is. What I’ll call “post-wounded” isn’t a shift in deep feeling (we understand these women still hurt) but a shift away from wounded affect: These women are aware that “woundedness” is overdone and overrated. They are wary of melodrama, so they stay numb or clever instead. Post-wounded women make jokes about being wounded or get impatient with women who hurt too much. The post-wounded woman conducts herself as if preempting certain accusations: Don’t cry too loud; don’t play victim. Don’t ask for pain meds you don’t need; don’t give those doctors another reason to doubt. Post-wounded women fuck men who don’t love them and then they feel mildly sad about it, or just blasé about it; they refuse to hurt about it or to admit they hurt about it—or else they are endlessly self-aware about it, if they do allow themselves this hurting.
The post-wounded posture is claustrophobic: jadedness, aching gone implicit, sarcasm quick on the heels of anything that might look like self-pity. I see it in female writers and their female narrators, troves of stories about vaguely dissatisfied women who no longer fully own their feelings. Pain is everywhere and nowhere. Post-wounded women know that postures of pain play into limited and outmoded conceptions of womanhood. Their hurt has a new native language spoken in several dialects: sarcastic, jaded, opaque; cool and clever. They guard against those moments when melodrama or self-pity might split their careful seams of intellect, expose the shame of self-absorption without self-awareness.
I was just wondering how many public libraries have nerdfighter clubs? I really want begin a nerdfighter club in one of the public libraries where I work, but as I’m a fairly new employee, and busy with school, I’m nervous to bring it up to my…
So my 29th birthday is tomorrow. My birthday coincides with the Mexican independence day, something that I think is cool since I was born in Mexico.
I already celebrated my birthday with my family in Miami (I live in Orlando, FL) this past weekend though, so I am not too interested in celebrating tomorrow. I think I will save festivities with friends here in Orlando for this incoming weekend. I wasn’t sure if I would stay here or go to Miami instead and I’m still unsure but I may just end up staying.
I dunno. I used to have awesome birthday events but I have since stopped for many reasons, mainly that I am not as actively social as I used to be. Going to grad school and running a small business does not leave much time for socializing. I am in the process of looking into opening my schedule up for more socializing though. This will be done through my reading and application of The Now Habit which stresses that good work comes from a relatively loose work and not overloaded work schedule. The trick is to be ultra productive for small spurts of time, etc.
I guess I should also rant against getting older but I love it. Adulthood has been awesome to me /end brag